Wild Flowers or Weeds

I went to Dallas for my chemotherapy on Monday and they wouldn’t let me have my treatment until I saw a cardiologist. I described my symptoms to the nurse practitioner and she called them heart palpitations. In some ways I am relieved to not have to have chemo this week, in other ways my whole schedule is now messed up and my plan for our family vacation is now in question.

When my friend, Sheree, drove me back home from Dallas Monday evening, she looked at my husband’s wild flower patch and offered to have her husband mow it. What we saw as a beautiful field of wildflowers by our pond, she saw as weeds that needed cutting down. So many things in our lives can either be looked at as wildflowers or as weeds. An opportunity for beauty or something that needs to be mowed down and destroyed. I can look at this interruption in my treatment as an opportunity for wildflowers or weeds. What do I mean?

When I trust that God is in control of my life, of my doctors…I have to trust that He has a reason for the interruption. It may be inconvenient. It may cause concern and worry. It may be nothing. I can either get upset and let it steal my joy, or I can set back and watch and see what God is doing.

I hate feeling like a hypochondriac. I hate making a big deal out of nothing. But maybe God is exposing something that is hidden. Maybe He is just giving me a much needed break from chemo. We were supposed to leave for our family vacation on Thursday, but now I see the cardiologist on Friday morning. Hopefully he will allow me to go out of town and it won’t stop us from leaving. I don’t know when I will go back for my missed chemo appointment, but the good news is that I won’t feel as bad on vacation since I haven’t had my last round of chemo. (The bad news is that it prolongs my treatment cycle and I may have to go to Dallas next week in the middle of our vacation.)

Oh well, what do I choose to see when I look at this picture…Wildflowers or Weeds? I choose to see wildflowers and to trust God to order my steps.

Psalm 37:23
The Lord directs the steps of the godly.
He delights in every detail of their lives.

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Comments

  1. Angela honea says:

    Yes. God knows. He has it all taken care of.
    I love you and hope yalls vacation is the best ever! ( is it bad cause i was reading your blog during church tonight?). Heehee 🙂

  2. Kim Humphrey says:

    LaNell-
    I love that you can put into words what I know many others including myself feel!!! I’ve been fighting the “unknown illness” for over a year and recently just decided I needed an “attitude adjustment” (that’s what I like to call it lol). I’m going to see my 9th specialist next month, and it had gotten to a point that I wanted to give up, but one day it hit me that I just needed to change my attitude and honestly I’m grateful that God has given me this road to travel. Even though it has been LONG and HARD I have learned so much and truly feel that I have made changes in my life that The Lord has been wanting me to do for years!! I joke when people ask if I know what’s wrong yet… My answer is always “I know what’s NOT wrong but when the timing is right I will find the answers, until then I have to learn to lean and trust fully and completely on God and that He has got a master plan for me and I can’t wait to see what is in store, in the meantime I hope that I can touch as many lives as possible even if I’m not able to go and do like I want”.
    I admire you and love reading your blogs. They are truly inspiration. You have such a gift of putting thoughts into words that I struggle with!! I pray that your vacation will go on as planned and maybe this little hiccup was to give you a little peace and rest with your family!!!
    Love
    Kim

    • Love you and I am praying for you. My prayer is that what is hidden will be revealed and that your healing will spring forth speedily. We need to get together for lunch one day when we are both feeling ok. Enjoy your first days of summer with your kids.

  3. April Little says:

    Beautiful! Just a side note for you–after my nephew passed I was beside myself with grief. My body was in shock. It had suffered tragedy. I started having “heart palpitations” several times a day, sometimes several times per minute! They were a response to the tremendous amount of stress my body was under. After a few weeks of the medication they put me on to lessen them, I handed them over to God and stopped taking my medications. I have not had another one! God is good, LaNell. He WILL take care of you. You are in my prayers!

  4. Teresa DeLoney says:

    Gotta love the weeds/wildflowers! They bring beauty of their own. Might not have the gorgeousness of a rose or even the sweet aroma but they do have their season. I’m glad God’s a good gardener! 😉

  5. LaNell I see it as neither weeds nor wildflowers but as birth of new life. Weeds and wildflowers are the same, it is the birth of new life that can never be explained except by the miracle of life. I see this in you a birth of new cells, new life, over fresh new ground. Your healing will be exciting to all.

  6. Linda Threadgill says:

    My precious friend,

    I never see weeds in your life but wildflowers are just that, wild-flowers. They grow as they want and spring up in unexpected places, but they are beautiful, free flowers. Interruptions are a pain when they stop where we want to go but like the wildflowers, they just keep growing and swaying in God’s beautiful wind. Hang on, God has gone before you and you are planted firmly in His Word. He will give you the desires of your heart! I love you so much my friend. My heart and prayers are always with you!

  7. Mary Lou says:

    Precious LaNell,

    Oh, I love this one also. Again I am so touched the way the Lord gives you this gift and the way you can put it into words to share with others.

    So looking forward to the next time I get to see you.

    Hugs and Hugs

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